:: The Fred Willard Fan Site ::


:: Monday, September 30, 2002 ::

C-I-L-L My Landlord

James Taranto noticed an eerie similarity between the poetry of semi-literate New Jersey poet laureate Amiri Baraka and semi-literate Eddie Murphy SNL character Tyrone Green.
Who do Tom Ass Clarence Work for
Who doo doo come out the Colon's mouth
Who know what kind of Skeeza is a Condoleeza
Who pay Connelly to be a wooden negro
Who give Genius Awards to Homo Locus

And now Tyrone Green's oeuvre ...
Dark and Lonely on a Summer Night
Kill my Landlord, Kill my Landlord
Watchdog Barking, Do he Bite?
Kill my Landlord, Kill my Landlord
Slip in His Window, Break His Neck
Then His House I Start to Wreck
Got No Reason -- What the Heck
Kill my Landlord, Kill my Landlord
C-I-L-L My Landlord

Come to think of it, Tyrone Green's use of meter is is actually quite better.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 5:01 PM [+] ::

Just When You Thought He Couldn't Possibly Sink Any Further

Scott Ritter, the Nazimedia interview.
(Via Mike Hanson)
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:24 PM [+] ::
:: Sunday, September 29, 2002 ::

Is Someone Lost?

:: COINTELPRO Tool 4:01 PM [+] ::

Further Devaluation of the Term "Peace Activist"

And we're the ones alienating people by having the audacity to utter the word "evil?"

Then we have these winners ...
Four protesters arrested near the International Monetary Fund building have been charged with carrying explosives late Saturday during annual meetings of the world's financial leaders, police said Sunday.

Police officers had rounded up the protesters Saturday evening as they left an alley near the IMF and World Bank headquarters and said they found at least four coffee cans rigged with explosives in their backpacks.

Police spokesman Officer Tony O'Leary said the coffee cans contained nails and blasting caps, and that police also found smoke bombs in the protesters' bags.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 3:48 PM [+] ::
:: Friday, September 27, 2002 ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:15 PM [+] ::

"Jeepers! Those Black Men Sure Do Look Menacing When You Actually Meet One In Person!"

Black cops smacking rich, snotty white kids around ... what's not to love?
:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:55 PM [+] ::

I'm Back

Sure glad I was out of town for this.

UPDATE: I was going to post the photo itself, but had one of those rare flashes of good taste.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:51 PM [+] ::
:: Thursday, September 26, 2002 ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:57 PM [+] ::
:: Wednesday, September 25, 2002 ::

I Need A Vacation

Maybe a week on Yellowstone Lake. Ah, that's the ticket.

Oops, I forgot. I have no time. Or money.

So another two days in St. Louis, filled with the roar of printing presses will have to suffice. Regular posting will resume this weekend.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:55 AM [+] ::
:: Tuesday, September 24, 2002 ::

Fuck Jesse Jackson

Rev. Bloody Shirt is upset over a scene from the movie "Barbershop":
CHICAGO, Illinois (AP) -- Jesse Jackson says he's pleased the producers of "Barbershop" have apologized for the film's barbs about Rosa Parks, Martin Luther King Jr. and others, but still wants the jokes cut from future DVD and video editions of the hit movie.

The producers, Bob Teitel and George Tillman, told The Associated Press on Monday that they had apologized to Jackson on behalf of everyone involved with the film.

"I completely did not mean to offend anyone," Tillman said.

I've seen the movie, and I can tell you it's a great film, in its current state. I certainly didn't think the Rosa Parks jokes were out of line, or meant to offend. In fact, I think the scene made a serious point about African-American political mythology -- mythology on which Jesse Jackson's very survival depends.

Also, the CNN story doesn't note that the "and others" the movie made fun of were Rodney King, O.J. Simpson ... and Jackson himself. The scene ended with Cedric the Entertainer, after a pregnant pause, declaring, "Fuck Jesse Jackson!"

Think that might be what he's really pissed about?

(Via Damian Penny)

:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:58 PM [+] ::

This One's For Meryl

Welcome to Virginia, dear. You won't find Renaissance men like Mr. Booth in the Tollbooth State, no siree.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:02 AM [+] ::

AFP -- Abject Factual Poverty

Ahem ...
The administration of President George W. Bush is continuing to court Arab support for possible military action against Iraq, despite mounting domestic criticism of the plan.

Yep. Domestic criticism grows bigger by the second.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:33 AM [+] ::

Mumia Abu Jamal, Fire Your Publicist

A snubbing like this is inexcusable: no mention of your name in this Daily Wanker piece on the "Not In Our Name" celebrity petition. Brian Eno and Michael Franti are mentioned, but no Mumia.

Don't they know you've killed for far less than that?
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:12 AM [+] ::

Tired of Reading About Your Side Getting Its Ass Kicked in the War on Terror?

Well, the hebephrenic happy sacks at Indymedia have the cure for what ails you ...

This degree of denial will come in handy again, very soon.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:51 AM [+] ::
:: Sunday, September 22, 2002 ::

Profiles In Shame Gene Deficiency

In a piece entitled "The Murder of Arafat," terror apologist Uri Avnery causes some irrational exuberance:
While I am writing this, Yasser Arafat is still alive. But his life is hanging on a thread.

When we visited him the last time in his bombed-out Mukata?ah compound in Ramallah, I warned him that Sharon is determined to kill him.

Everybody acquainted with Sharon knows that he never lets go. When he does not achieve his aim the first time, he tries again, and again, and again, and again. Never, ever, does he give up.

As I write this, Sharon appears to have "given up" yet again. I wonder if this clown ever tires of being so embarrassingly wrong.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:05 PM [+] ::

Palestinian Yasmin Abu-Ramila, 7, from East Jerusalem, recovers September 22, 2002 after transplant surgery at the Schneider Children's Hospital in Petah Tikva, near Tel Aviv. Abu-Ramila received a kidney from Jonathan (Yoni) Jesner, a 19-year-old Jewish student from Glasgow in Scotland, who died on Friday from wounds sustained in a suicide bombing in Tel Aviv September 19, 2002. REUTERS/Havakuk Levison
:: COINTELPRO Tool 2:31 PM [+] ::
:: Saturday, September 21, 2002 ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:05 PM [+] ::

Now This Dissent -- Go Ahead And Crush It

Because merely voicing their opinions would be like farting in a blizzard, the anti-globo Luddites are inciting people to destroy public and private property:
Break a McDonald's window, get 300 points. Puncture a Washington D.C. police car tire to win 75 points. Score 400 points for a pie in the face of a corporate executive or World Bank delegate.

D.C. Assistant Police Chief Terrance Gainer told a congressional hearing on Friday that law authorities were in talks to decide whether planned protests were, "so deleterious to security efforts that we ought to take proactive action."

Several thousand people are expected to demonstrate outside the IMF and World Bank headquarters next weekend.

The Anti-Capitalist Convergence, a D.C.-based anarchist group, is also planning a day-long traffic blockade, banner-drops and protests against major corporations in the downtown core.

Chuck, the 37 year-old webmaster of the anarchist site www.infoshop.org who declined to give his last name, told Reuters his scavenger hunt was meant as a joke.

"People were asking for things to do when they come to D.C. We made the list to get people thinking, so they don't do the boring, standard stuff," he said. "I doubt people will actually keep track of what they do for points."

Uh, great reporting there, Reuters. The guy's name is Munson. Charles "Chuck0" Munson.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:18 PM [+] ::

Dude, Just Have a Dr. Pepper™

Andrew Northrup compares the two new Pepsi flavors to "ass milk." I'm proud to say I have no frame of reference for that, but I do like his ideas for some other flavors to be rolled out next year:
Pepsi Chunky Style
West Nile Pepsi
Pepsi Toothpaste and Orange Juice Swirl
Barry Bonds Spits His Chewing Tobacco In A Regular Pepsi Bottle, Looks Around, And Then Puts It Back On The Supermarket Shelf Like Nothing Happened
Pepsi Nast
Pepsic Ulcer
Pepsi Blue II: The Reckoning
I Can't Believe It's Not Drano!
Marmite Pepsi
Pepsi Green (made from 87% post-consumer recycled Pepsi)
V. C. Andrews Presents: Pepsi's in the Attic
Pepsi Love: Specially-Brewed in Grace Slick's Bong From 1968
Organic Pepsi
Pepsi Medroxyprogesterone Acetate

:: COINTELPRO Tool 9:17 AM [+] ::
:: Friday, September 20, 2002 ::

Take Care, Bruce

I would be remiss if I didn't add my voice to the list of those lamenting the demise of Bruce Hill's blog, War Now!

I don't know the details, and frankly I neither want nor need to. The quality of his work is all I need to decide that this is outrageous. To whomever is responsible: fuck you.

But Bruce's brother Murray and David Bisman have a new blog which has taken Bruce's place among my links.

On the left.

Get there.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 1:04 AM [+] ::

More Massive Intelligence Failure™ Hype

There is simply no reason whatsoever to read any of the coverage on the Joint Congressional Intelligence panel report on September 11 intelligence failures. If you simply read the panel's report yourself, you'll know more than the reporters who covered it, or at least more than they will intentionally let on.

Dana Priest in particular apparently got no further than the introduction, which led to this facile lede:
The U.S. intelligence community received a surprising number of credible reports of a likely terrorist attack prior to Sept. 11, including some threats to domestic targets, according to a congressional report unveiled Wednesday.

"Surprising number?" The majority of the coverage seems to be engrossed in the revelation that there were 12 warnings of possible terrorist attacks using airplanes over a seven year period.


Over a seven year period. You don't need experience in plodding through intelligence reports and implementing the periodic changes in threat conditions to know how truly silly this is -- but it doesn't hurt. In any event, the report gives that figure the context that the reporters failed to provide:
These intelligence reports should be understood in their proper context. First, they generally did not contain specific information as to where, when, and how a terrorist attack might occur and, generally, are not corroborated by further information. Second, these reports represented a small percentage of the threat information that the Intelligence Community obtained during this period, most of which pointed to the possibility of attacks against U.S. interests overseas.[Emphasis mine; p.14]

The report goes on to state that "the peak in Bin Laden-related reporting came in June 2001, with Islamic extremists, including Bin Laden or al-Qa'ida, referenced in 18 of the 298 articles in the SEIBS of that month." [p.24]

Moreover, the notion that all of these warnings should necessarily have been viewed as harbingers of what actually happened on September 11. Most of these plots involved explosives, and the "bojinka" plot in particular actually involved hijacking U.S. planes overseas and exploding them over the Pacific. One even involved taking a plane from the U.S. to Afghanistan, to ransom the passengers for their imprisoned cohorts.

Condi Rice was full of shit when she claimed that there was no indication whatsoever that terrorists might use planes as missiles, but the preponderance of the threat information available would lead any reasonable person to focus on the traditional modes and targets. In that same seven year period, there were five bombings by al-qaeda, four of which were delivered via the same method that killed over 240 Marines in Beirut nearly 20 years ago, and all of which were overseas.

Priest also takes the intelligence community to task for not making these warnings public:
The issue of warning the public came up in today's testimony which featured Kristin Breitweiser and Stephen Push, who lost spouses in the Sept. 11 attacks.

"How many victims may have taken notice of these Middle Eastern men that were boarding their plane?" said Breitweiser, of Middletown, N.J. , if the public had been made aware of the possibility of a terrorist attack.

Now, we've seen the reactions when the government issued vague threat warnings, without giving the public actionable information: Stop It!, exclaimed one Tom Friedman, and some other putz had the audacity to accuse the administration of craven political motives and "scaremongering."

But yet again, Priest omits important information that jumps out at casual readers of the panel's report. While the Intelligence Community did not engage in "sacaremongering," they did issue several warnings throughout various federal agencies last summer, including an FAA circular, one public State department warning, a State demarche in Pakistan, four separate DoD warnings, and an FBI communique to "federal, state, and local law enforcement agencies of an increased volume of threat reporting" on al-qaeda activities.

The report goes on to state that these warnings decreased in August [pp.24-25]

Having said all that, September 11 certainly was an intelligence failure, but the superficial reporting on the issue doesn't even begin to capture the complexity or depth of it. The best
description I've seen is Thomas C. Schelling's foreward to Roberta Wohlsetter's Warnig and Decision (also cited in Bill Gertz's Breakdown):
Surprise, when it happens to a government, is likely to be a complicated, diffuse, bureaucratic thing. It includes neglect of responsibility but also responsibility so poorly defined or so ambiguously delegated that action gets lost. It includes gaps in intelligence, but also intelligence that, like a string of pearls too precious to wear, is too sensitive to give to those who need it. It includes the alarm that fails to work, but also the alarm that has gone off so often it has been disconnected. It includes the unalert watchman, but also the one who knows he'll get chewed out by his superior if he gets higher authority out of bed.

It includes the contingencies that occur to no one, but also those that everyone assumes somebody else is taking care of. It includes straightforward procrastination, but also decisions protracted by internal disagreement. It includes, in addition, the inability of individual human beings to rise to the occasion until they are sure it is the occasion ? which is usually too late.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:39 AM [+] ::
:: Thursday, September 19, 2002 ::

Speaking of Pirates ...

Because of the recent death of a sailor, the Australian navy is reviewing it's shipboard alcohol consumption policies:
The Armed Forces Federation of Australia (AFFA) has responded to a Navy board of inquiry into the death of a sailor at sea, saying it is pleased the Navy is reviewing its alcohol policies.

The inquiry found leading seaman Cameron Gurr fell overboard from the HMAS Darwin in May after breaking Navy rules by consuming excessive amounts of alcohol.

It made 71 recommendations, including improved safety procedures on Navy ships and a clampdown on alcohol consumption.

But AFFA spokesman Bruce Tanner says it agrees with the chief of the Navy, Admiral Chris Ritchie, that alcohol-free ships would not work.

"It was the use of illegal alcohol that was involved in this incident, not the use of legal alcohol," he said. [emphasis mine]

:: COINTELPRO Tool 5:44 PM [+] ::

Paz Para Vieques

Some people are only tolerant of violence when it's directed toward military personnel ...
WASHINGTON -- Puerto Rico's governor is promising a ``thorough inquiry'' into Navy complaints that local police on Vieques Island stood by idly last week as demonstrators threw rocks and fired flares at service members along the boundary of a controversial bombing range.

How about a thorough inquiry into the controversial tax shelters and other subsidies provided to Puerto Rico?
:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:41 AM [+] ::

Texas-sized Whining

This is priceless:
There's a USS Dallas and USS Houston. There's also a USS City of Corpus Christi and USS Austin. And there's a USS San Antonio and a USS Texas under construction. Someone missing?

Yup, that old Army post on the banks of the Trinity River -- the one with the upstart naval base and the one to which the secretary of the Navy comes home on the weekends.

Leave it to the Lone Star state to whimper about the Navy ships being named after only five of its cities -- including Ft. Worth's twin. And that's out of a total of 51 ships in the only current category (Los Angeles class attack submarines) that are named after cities.

Yeah, Ft. Worth should have a submarine named after it -- after we christen USS St. Louis.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:21 AM [+] ::
:: Wednesday, September 18, 2002 ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:41 PM [+] ::

Save The Deserts!

This is quite unnerving:
"Africa's deserts are in retreat," New Scientist magazine said on Wednesday.

The aerial survey, commissioned by Dutch, German and American overseas aid agencies, shows increased vegetation in northern Burkina Faso, which 20 years ago was experiencing a desertification crisis because of declining rainfall and destructive farming methods.

Scientists suspect that increased rainfall since the droughts of the 1970s and 1980s and better farming techniques have led to the reverse trend and the greening of parts of Africa.

A comparison with archive photos show an increase in vegetation in the past 15 years in southern Mauritania, northern Burkina Faso, north-western Niger, central Chad and much of Sudan and parts of Eritrea.

"Analysts say the gradual greening has been happening since the mid-1980s, though has gone largely unnoticed. Only now is the evidence being pieced together," the magazine added.

Not satisfied with the destruction they've already caused, the globalists have now set their sights on the earth's silicon dioxide-centric ecosystems.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:40 PM [+] ::

My Eyes Have Been Opened!

My country's "subservient media" won't run stories like this, but luckily I have access to libertine United Arab Emirates' Gulf News
Rather than put 9-11 into its proper context, the Bush administration has fostered a new siege mentality onto the American people by repeating at every opportunity over and over again like a mantra "they are jealous of our freedoms" or "they hate democracy". The truth must not be exposed.

Anyone outside the influence of this pernicious campaign against individual thought, would be disposed to ask: How can those who hate democracy be envious of people enjoying freedom? But, sadly, the Americans who ask these kinds of questions are in the minority.

Instead, the American public has fallen victim to a gigantic propaganda/indoctrination campaign, organised by its own government. The U.S. government and its subservient media make a great team.

September 11, 2002 was a perfect example of this Orwellian-type mind-control on the part of the powers that be in the U.S. On that day the American government pulled out all the stops. Just minutes before the president's speech at the Pentagon, Donald Rumsfeld, the U.S. Defence Minister, said: "We came here today to rededicate ourselves to the cause of human liberty".

This barking moonbat even has the audacity to call our society "totalitarian." Classic.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:47 PM [+] ::

Scupper that Fisk bilge, ye cowardly swabs!

Tomorrow is Talk Like a Pirate Day. So sayeth Dave Barry, which is good enough for me.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:30 PM [+] ::

November 14, eh?

Here's the coolest e-vite ever.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 5:59 PM [+] ::


AP reports that an Al-Jazeera employee is being held in Guantanamo.
Sudanese assistant cameraman Sami al-Haj was detained in December and is in custody at Guantanamo's Camp Delta, the Qatar-based television said in a statement faxed late on Monday to The Associated Press.

Al-Jazeera said it knew in April that al-Haj was detained in a camp operated by U.S. forces in Afghanistan. "Later, we learned through correspondence with Mr. al-Haj's wife that he is now in Guantanamo," said the statement, which the station said was also sent to human rights groups.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 5:24 PM [+] ::
:: Tuesday, September 17, 2002 ::

This Is Truly Vile

From the San Diego Union-Tribune:
Minutes before Danielle van Dam's remains were found Feb. 27, David Westerfield's lawyers were brokering a deal with prosecutors:

He would tell police where he dumped the 7-year-old girl's body; they would not seek the death penalty.

Law enforcement sources told The San Diego Union-Tribune yesterday defense lawyers Steven Feldman and Robert Boyce were negotiating for a life sentence for the 50-year-old design engineer, a neighbor of the van Dams in Sabre Springs.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:09 PM [+] ::

Caution: Gloating Ahead

Ossified peacenik Geov Parrish is lamenting the lack of an anti-war movement.
There is, in fact, plenty of anti-war activism in Seattle these days, but it's buried on the Web and in church basements and in private conversations. That could still blossom into a formidable local anti-war presence, as it did in Portland last month during President Bush's visit. Or it could stay hidden--and the large numbers of Seattleites appalled by a prospective war could continue to find that their views are conspicuously missing from the public debate.

He says that like it's a bad thing.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 8:01 PM [+] ::
:: Saturday, September 14, 2002 ::

More Supressing Dissent™ Nonsense

In "You Will Fly the Flag, and You Will Like It", martyr-for-hire Aimee Liu tells this harrowing account of having our perverted, jingositic bastardization of patriotism forced on her like a burqa. This would be a good time to have the kids leave the room ...
Returning from an early walk Wednesday--our day of national mourning--I found a flag stuck in the geranium plant at the end of our driveway. A foot-long laminated flag on a 2-foot spike. The attached tag read, "Compliments of your neighborhood Realtor [followed by name and phone number]. Proudly wave your flag on these days:" And then it listed all the national secular holidays from New Year's to Veteran's Day. Sept. 11 was missing from the list, but I presume that will last only until the stock of these blue and white notices is exhausted and the Realtors reprint.

I looked up and down the block. Every driveway had its flag. The Japanese American household across the street. The Italians. The Persians. The Lithuanians. Even the houses under construction where no one was living had American flags. And, of course, the houses that were up for sale. Clearly a case of massive involuntary flag-waving. Imposed flag-waving. Worse, commercial flag-waving.

"Imposed flag-waving." Got that? These anoymous thought police didn't staple the flag to her hollow forehead, or even stick around to browbeat her into submission. They left a flag in her fucking flower pot. With a note How fragile is her will that this would be interpreted as an imposition of any kind?

It is quite sickening that anyone would perceive what was surely a gesture of kindness and generosity -- even if it was driven by slick, PR motives -- as an attempt to control the feebleminded proles who just don't understand the world as well as sophisticates like Liu. But it shouldn't surprise me. These are the same apparatchiks who label as hate any expression of love for the things that they themselves hate.

They've also followed in the footsteps of the Puritans, by defining any widespread expression of views contrary to their own as oppression against them.

I was given given a small flag myself on Wednesday morning, coming out of the Pentagon metro stop. Foolishly, I took it as an expression of solidarity by someone I didn't even know.

Had I realized that the true intent was to enforce a tyranny of the majority against the morally blind, I would have continued to wear it in my front shirt pocket for the rest of the week.
Thanks for letting me know how easy it is to intimidate these idiots.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:19 AM [+] ::
:: Friday, September 13, 2002 ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 7:04 PM [+] ::

In Case You Forgot ...

Ted Rall is still a dick.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 1:49 PM [+] ::
:: Thursday, September 12, 2002 ::

Damn, That Saddam's Crafty!

According to the Philipine daily Inquirer, the Iraqi dictator is making diplomatic moves that would require the U.S. to actually put a carrier within 3,000 miles of the Persian Gulf in order to launch air strikes against his country:
Iraq Appeals To Manila On Airspace Support For US

By Fe Zamora

THE IRAQI government Wednesday appealed to the Philippine government to "rethink" its position to open its airspace to American planes in the event of a war between Iraq and the United States.

Iraqi embassy charge d'affaires Samir A. Masih Bolus also said in a statement that the Philippines and the Filipino people "are misinformed of the real situation" in Iraq.

The statement blamed US President George Bush for "war mongering" and for peddling lies about the oil-rich country led by Saddam Hussein, and described the US as a terrorist and a mass murderer.

"We hope that under such a context, the Philippine government can rethink its position on the matter," Bolus said.

Bolus stressed that Iraq was not seeking Philippine support in case of attack from the US. "All we ask is that we stand together for peace based on respect to our sovereignty as a nation and as a people. And in the same time we should not forget destiny of more than 1.5 million Filipino workers in the Middle East if the war breaks out there," his statement said.

On Tuesday, Foreign Secretary Blas Ople was quoted as saying that "any US request for the use of Philippine skies could be made in the context of international war against terrorism" which President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo fully supported.

Next, Saddam will be schmoozing the Costa Ricans to get them to prevent us from using their territory to launch our land attack. Then, he'll really have us in a corner.


:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:18 PM [+] ::

I'm With Damian

Yes, Mr. Rosenberg, journalism does have a responsibility to "puncture orthodoxies." But as far as defenses for tasteless articles go, this is pretty pathetic.

I'm not sure which orthodoxies were punctured by this piece, or even if there was a serious point to it at all, other than to affirm that Salon readers are shallow assholes. Despite that, I do not fault Salon -- being just a messenger -- for bringing these views to my attention. People should be aware that there are people in this country who are that callous and ignorant. But there were 364 other days in the year on which Salon could have published this tripe. Frankly, the piece was neither timely, nor perishable, and there was no reason it had to run on the anniversary. Showing just a little respect doesn't make you a journalistic coward.

And your excuse that this was just one of two dozen Sept. 11 anniversary articles is thoroughly lame. Your "forbidden letters" piece in no way adds balance, or any other journalistic value, to the mix.

To be honest, I was glad Salon was tanking long before yesterday, and I don't think there's any doubt that they will go bankrupt.

They won't be missed.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:40 AM [+] ::

Canada Beware

CKLN radio ran an interview with yours truly today, on Mike Ruppert's conspiracy theories.

The promo refers to me as "mild-mannered." That is a typo. It should read "Quiet. Too quiet."
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:43 AM [+] ::

Yeah, I'd Follow This Clown Into Battle. Just Out of Sheer Curiosity

I can't addd much to what Tony Adragna and Tim Blair have already said about Scott Ritter's flakiness.

Except for this self-explanatory excerpt from his appearance on CNN Monday morning:
ZAHN: And we want to welcome back Scott Ritter, who is a former U.N. weapons inspector from Baghdad, to continue our conversation.

Scott Ritter making it abundantly clear that he does not think the U.S. should be considering a war right now.

A question to you about inspections, because you support that idea. What makes you think that if U.N. weapons inspectors went in now, after not being on the ground for four years, it would be any different than the last time around, when Richard Butler, who was the chief U.N. weapon inspector, said the Iraqis often moved stuff when they knew you guys were going to be on the ground?

RITTER: I had been there since 1991 working under Ralph Acquas (ph) when the vast majority of the actual disarmament took place. By the time Richard Butler came, we had already destroyed Iraq's weapons programs. We were hunting down for, you know, missing items, you know, a piece of metal here, some documents there.

And, yes, Iraq could have moved them, but this does not constitute a weapons program. It's illegal, and this is what inspectors need to do, come back here, finish the job so that Iraq can get on with rebuilding its economy, etc. But, you know, Richard Butler knows for darned sure that the Iraqis were not moving weapons from his weapons inspectors.[Emphasis mine]

I do have one question, however. In addition to Butler, David Kay and Richard Spertzel have expressed dismay at Ritter's conclusions, testifying before the HASC on Tuesday. Is there anyone even remotely associated with UNSCOM that sides with Ritter?
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:18 AM [+] ::
:: Tuesday, September 10, 2002 ::

No Posting Tomorrow

Among other things, it's my mother's birthday.

One last entry for my Sept. 11 reflections ...

Dana and Zoe Falkenberg

:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:18 PM [+] ::

:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:39 PM [+] ::

Retired fire chief Joseph Curry barks orders to rescue teams as they clear through debris that was once the World Trade Center Sept. 14, 2001, in New York. Photo by Photographer's Mate 1st Class Preston Keres, USN

:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:34 PM [+] ::

Naval Station Norfolk, Va. (Oct. 15, 2000) -- An injured Sailor from the Arleigh Burke class guided missile destroyer USS Cole (DDG 67) shares a tearful reunion with her mother. 33 Sailors were injured when a terrorist bomb struck the U.S. Navy destroyer October 12th, 2000. All arrived at Naval Air Station Norfolk, Virginia, from Germany on an Air Force C-141 transport. Six remaining injured are stayed in Ramstein, Germany, until their condition becomes more stable. U.S. Navy photo by Photographer's Mate 2nd Class Chris Pastol
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:37 PM [+] ::
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:54 AM [+] ::

Flacking For Hizbollah

Robert Fisk continues to hit new lows, this time brazenly defending the Lebanon-based "terrorist" (his scare quotes) organization from the irresponsible jingoistic polemics of the Bush administration.
The Syrian Accountability Act, which accuses Damascus of supporting "terrorism", will come into force as President Bush is speaking and will follow only days after the State Department branded the Lebanese Hizbollah as the "A-team of terrorism", more dangerous even than Osama bin Laden's al-Qa'ida. Like Iraq, the Hizbollah had nothing to do with the 11 September attacks – indeed, they were among the first to condemn them – but the White House now seems set on painting allies and enemies alike in the Middle East as a focus of evil.

Huh? Is he really suggesting that Hizbollah is even a potential ally? I'm sure the survivors of William Buckley and Lt. Col William Higgins will find that fact comforting.

Prick. I do hope someone in the blogosphere will be covering this dickhead's lecture at GMU today (not tomorrow). I was planning on it myself, but my job has me traveling today.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:55 AM [+] ::

A North Dakota National Guard F-16 fighter screams over a burning Pentagon on Sept. 11, 2001, in this painting by Rick Herter. The painting is now part of the Air Force Art Collection.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:29 AM [+] ::
:: Sunday, September 08, 2002 ::

Arlington, Va. (Sep. 12, 2001) -- Firefighters, rescue workers and military members prepare to unfurl the U.S. flag from the roof of the Pentagon on the day after the terrorist attack on the Pentagon. American Airlines FLT 77 was bound for Los Angeles from Washington Dulles with 58 passengers and 6 crew. All aboard the aircraft were killed, along with 125 people in the Pentagon. U.S. Naval photo by Photographer?s Mate 1st Class Michael W. Pendergrass.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:22 AM [+] ::

Arlington, Va. (Sep. 14, 2001) -- Aerial view of the destruction caused when a hijacked commercial airliner crashed into the Pentagon on Sep. 11th. The terrorist attack caused extensive damage to the Pentagon. American Airlines FLT 77 was bound for Los Angeles from Washington Dulles with 58 passengers and 6 crew. All aboard the aircraft were killed, along with 125 people in the Pentagon. U.S. Navy Photo Courtesy of DoD Photographer Tech. Sgt. Cedric H. Rudisill
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:20 AM [+] ::

New York, N.Y. (Sep. 14, 2001) -- What is left of the south tower of the World Trade Center in New York City, stands like a tombstone among the debris and devastation caused by the Sep. 11, terrorist attack. U.S. Navy photo by Journalist 1st Class Preston Keres.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:17 AM [+] ::

Ground Zero, New York City, N.Y. (Sept. 17, 2001) -- An aerial view shows only a small portion of the crime scene where the World Trade Center collapsed following the Sept. 11 terrorist attack. Surrounding buildings were heavily damaged by the debris and massive force of the falling twin towers. Clean-up efforts are expected to continue for months. U.S. Navy photo by Chief Photographer's Mate Eric J. Tilford.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:14 AM [+] ::

Ground Zero, New York City, N.Y. (Sept. 17, 2001) -- An aerial view shows only a small portion of the crime scene where the World Trade Center collapsed following the Sept. 11 terrorist attack. Surrounding buildings were heavily damaged by the debris and massive force of the falling twin towers. Clean-up efforts are expected to continue for months. U.S. Navy photo by Chief Photographer's Mate Eric J. Tilford.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 10:11 AM [+] ::
:: Saturday, September 07, 2002 ::

New York, N.Y. (Sept. 14, 2001) -- A fire fighter emerges from the smoke and debris of the World Trade Center. The twin towers of the center were destroyed in a Sep. 11 terrorist attack. U.S. Navy Photo by Photographer's Mate 2nd Class Jim Watson.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 4:23 PM [+] ::

Blood Pressure Dangerously Low?

Then get a load of this.

Hey, you okay? Speak to me ...
:: COINTELPRO Tool 3:57 PM [+] ::

Our Friends The Saudis, Part 34,876

The Saudi Entity is trying to pin yet another spate of anti-Western terror attacks on (wait for it ...) Westerners.
British embassy staff in Riyadh have been accused by the Saudi Arabian authorities of coordinating a campaign of anti-western terrorist bombings in the kingdom, the Guardian has learned.

The accusation that the British embassy in Riyadh coordinated the bombings to destabilise the Saudi regime is the latest and most bizarre piece of information to escape the pall of secrecy behind which the Saudis have been conducting legal proceedings against seven westerners who say they have been tortured into making false confessions.

Outrage? Anyone? Why the fuck do I have to read about this in the Daily Wanker?

:: COINTELPRO Tool 3:49 PM [+] ::

Arlington, Va. (Sep. 14, 2001) -- Agents from several federal agencies, fire fighters, rescue workers and engineers work at the Pentagon crash site on Sep. 14, 2001, where a hijacked American Airlines flight slammed into the building on Sep. 11. The terrorist attack caused extensive damage to the west face of the building and followed similar attacks on the twin towers of the World Trade Center in New York City. American Airlines FLT 77 was bound for Los Angeles from Washington Dulles with 58 passengers and 6 crew. All aboard the aircraft were killed, along with 125 people in the Pentagon. DoD photo by Tech. Sgt. Cedric H. Rudisill.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:29 AM [+] ::
:: Friday, September 06, 2002 ::

New York, N.Y. (Sept. 14, 2001) -- New York City firemen walk past the American flag as they work their way toward the heart of the devastation that was once the World Trade Center. U.S. Navy Photo by Journalist 1st Class Preston Keres.

This story, and it's accompanying photo gallery are not for the squeamish. They aren't for the jaded, either.

Arlington, Va. (Sep. 14, 2001) -- A Clock frozen at the time of impact when a hijacked commercial airliner crashed into the Pentagon on Sep. 11. The terrorist attack caused extensive damage to the Pentagon. American Airlines FLT 77 was bound for Los Angeles from Washington Dulles with 58 passengers and 6 crew. All aboard the aircraft were killed, along with 125 people in the Pentagon. U.S. Navy Photo Courtesy of DoD Photographer Staff Sgt. Larry A. Simmons.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 3:57 PM [+] ::

This Is What We Need Just to Train Our Troops

We're completing another COMPTUEX at the Vieques training range, without benefit of live ordnance -- but don't worry, I'm sure they'll learn quickly doing it for real in the Persian Gulf.
Three Navy security personnel were hit by rocks - one by a rock hurled from a slingshot - during two separate incidents last night. To protect the safety of the Navy security forces, tear gas canisters were released at both of the disturbances.

In addition, more than 45 feet of fencing were cut at two separate locations and unknown persons set a fire along the fence-line at a third location. The fencing will cost nearly $5,000 to repair. This brings the total amount of fencing cut since May 2000 to 30,294 feet, adding to the more than $3 million of taxpayer funds that have been used to repair federal property damaged by vandals during this period.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 3:24 PM [+] ::

Maybe Harry Potter™ Is a Satanic Plot

This is just wrong.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 9:56 AM [+] ::
:: Thursday, September 05, 2002 ::

New York, N.Y. (Sept. 15, 2001) -- A tired search dog finds time to rest as rescue efforts at the World Trade Center in New York City continue just a few feet away. U.S. Navy photo by Journalist 1st Class Preston Keres.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 5:03 PM [+] ::

Sure Glad We Got Rid of Those Guys ...

... they were really starting to get on my nerves.

Tim Blair says that anyone who hasn't yet read Andrea Harris' omnibus rant is banned from the internet.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 4:58 PM [+] ::
:: Wednesday, September 04, 2002 ::

"Pouring Fuel on Radical Embers"

This gem just rolled off the UPI wires ...
A study by Martin Indyk, a former assistant secretary of state for Near Eastern affairs, and who is now a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, tracked the number of demonstrations in 21 Arab countries from Morocco to Dubai, since the start of the war on terrorism, until Nov. 2001.

During the first week of the campaign: nine demonstrations.

During the second week: three.

During the third week: one.

During the fourth week: two.

During the fifth week: zero.

And during the sixth week: one.

Why such lethargy?

Most Arab countries -- including Saudi Arabia, where traditional Wahabism dominates -- would, much as the West, prefer to see the Islamist fundamentalist menace disappear. The threats to their stability perpetrated by the likes of bin Laden hangs over the heads of Middle East rulers like the fabled sword of Damocles.

The piece goes on to give serious consideration to the threat of Arab oil and trade boycotts, which I think is a bit overstated, considering how many Nike™ and Addidas™ logos you see at said demonstrations.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 6:38 PM [+] ::

This is probably old news to most of you, but reader Mike Daley e-mailed me this link -- a Sept. 11 commemoration of sorts that I hadn't seen before. Despite the Enya soundtrack, it's quite succinct and moving.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 1:48 PM [+] ::

Must ... Fight ... Urge to Kill ...

THe London Times injects this spin in its coverage of the relief of the USS Kitty Hawk CO:
The giant aircraft carriers of the US Navy are run like modern cities, boasting 2,400 telephones, six-channel television, five dentists, four shops, two barbers’ shops, two lawyers and one post office. On any one day more than 17,000 meals are being prepared and served for the 5,600-strong crew.

Boarding one is like entering a time warp back to the former Deep South. In the bowels of the carrier, where the crew are cooped up for six months at a time, manual workers sleep dozens to a room. Most are black or Puerto Rican, paid $7,000 to $10,000 a year to work in the broiling temperatures of the kitchens and engine rooms.

As you move up the 11 segregated levels towards the pilots’ quarters beneath the deck, the living quarters become larger, the air cooler and the skin tones lighter. Officers exist in almost total ignorance of the teeming world beneath them, passing around second-hand tales of murders, gang-fights and drug abuse. Visitors are banned from venturing down to the lowest decks, which swelter next to the vast nuclearpowered engines.

Quite obviously, these two slobbering jackasses haven't been anywhere near a Navy vessel in about 30 years.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 1:34 PM [+] ::

What's The Deal With Airline Couscous?

Mike Moynihan has a good post on the Jackie Mason/Palestinian opening act flap, comparing the coverage of that incidence of "censorship" to the coverage -- or lack thereof, discounting the blogosphere -- of the Manchester Institute of Technology's boycott against all Israeli academics, and firing of two professors who snuck in before the ban.

Apart from that, I feel I was cheated by those rat bastards at Phillip Morris. Nowhere in the pamphlet-sized copy of the U.S. Constitution they mailed me (to convince me that the tobacco lawsuits were wrong) does it say anything about a right to open for Jackie Mason.

I think I'm entitled to open for Dave Atell. It's my birthright, dammit.

But take a gander at the jilted comedian's Web site. Here are a few his comic stylings, but be warned: they're about as funny as Margo Kingston is beautiful ...
When in Rome, do as the Romans ...

My dad always used to say he loved this country. You could do anything you wanted in America, he'd say. When my father first came to this country, the immigration officer at Ellis Island directed him to shave his beard and get rid of the long flowing Arab robes. "When in Rome, do as the Romans," the immigration officer told my dad.

So, dad shaved off his beard and replaced the long flowing Arabian robes with a three-piece pinstriped suit, and went right out and started pillaging and raping ... He just retired, after 35 years, as an officer with the Enron Corporation ...

Just a silly question ...

Q: How many Arab/Jewish comedian duos does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: We don't know yet.

Q: How many Arab/Jewish comedian duos does it take to screw up comedy? ....

Airport security leads to rise in relationships ...

It used to be that the best place to meet your future "significant other" was at the grocery store. Nowadays, the best place is at airport security. Airport sources say that security searches have led to a greater level of intimacy and many passengers are now meeting their security agents at the nearby bar. Said one, "A cavity search can go a long way to cut through the idle chit chat and mindless banter you find at a bar, grocery store or even an Alcohol Anonymous meeting."

President Bush says no more impromptu press conferences

President Bush will no longer hold impromptu press conferences. His staff says the President needs at least three days to translate the documents from Hebrew into English before he will read them to the press.

Arafat office siege impacts his conduct

Palestinian President Yasir Arafat was under siege for six weeks. The Israelis destroyed most of his compound at the Presidential Palace in Ramallah.

Arafat's aides complained that President Arafat couldn't shave, shower or change clothes during the military blockade.

Israeli Prime Minister Ariel Sharon said he was shocked by the revelations, adding, "I was hoping we would have changed his life a bit."

Siege of Arafat compound destroys his services

CNN's Christiane Amanpour interviewed Arafat during the siege and asked him how things were going.

ARAFAT: "They destroyed my cable. They destroyed my cable."

AMANPOUR: "You mean you can't watch Al-Jazeera TV?"

ARAFAT: "Al Jazeera? I'm talking about Jayree Springer. Jayree! Jayree!"

It was big pootie week on the Jerry Springer Show.

Hyuk. Brings to mind the guy who claimed he couldn't get hired as a radio announcer because he was J-J-J-Jewish.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:13 PM [+] ::
:: Tuesday, September 03, 2002 ::

A Grand Idea

I have to agree with you, Damian. Jonathan Last's modest proposal is the best idea out there for a Sept. 11 anniversary. Sure would beat candlelight vigils and people holding hands (and if I see one Maya Angelou poetry reading, someone's getting kicked in the nuts).

But I also agree with Last that it won't happen.

Which is why I've been doing my part, posting these old photos, without comment, and will do so through the 10th.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 2:01 PM [+] ::

The Politics of Pissing

According to some blithering idiot, my use of a toilet is the root of misery in the Third World.
The TV special, hosted by hosted PBS's Bill Moyers, was taped on Tuesday and is set to air Friday night.

A female panelist from India complained that the flush toilet encourages excessive water consumption around the world and is not ecologically friendly.

The remark prompted an associate of Smith, CEI's Chris Horner, to ponder what alternative the woman would suggest. "Presumably the preferred solution to human waste problems is now abstinence," Horner quipped.

That actually isn't too far off the mark. I recall similar politicization of the urinal. Archfeminists in Sweden (where else?) moved to ban these emblems of male oppression, arguing that pissing while standing was a "nasty macho gesture."

The right took this so seriously that they interpreted a move by the U.S. Navy to replace urinals with toilets on aircraft carriers as part of the creeping feminization of the armed forces. This is almost as absurd as the position of the Swedes, as I, unfortunately, can personally attest.

My first job in the Navy was as R (repair) Division officer on a large amphib, which gave me ownership of the ship's CHT (collection, holding, and transfer) system: all urinals, toilets, related piping systems, tanks and the aerators and comminutors (grinders that chopped up the "brown trout" before it was pumped over the side -- oh, don't worry, they only do that outside of 12 Nautical Miles from land).

Because of the "water conservation" of the urinals, my hull technicians would have to waste hours each week blowing out CHT piping to remove calcium buildup (that's what the cakes are supposed to reduce, more than reducing foul odors. But the truth is they do a lousy job at both). My employees would have welcomed such a move toward "feminizing" the ship's commodes.

I guess the Luddite Left would have us all squat over bidets. Sorry, not happening. You'll get my American Standard™ when you pry it from my cold, dead ass.
(Via Cracker Barrel Philosopher, via Andrea Harris
:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:28 PM [+] ::

Are There Any Pardoned Criminals Who Haven't Weighed In On the Iraq Issue?

Moments ago on Fox News, former National Security Advisor Robert "Bud" McFarlane was asked whether he thought the American people had "the stomach" for going it alone in a war to topple Hussein.
:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:39 AM [+] ::
:: Monday, September 02, 2002 ::


Stockholm Syndrome poster child Yvonne Ridley recently did an interview with Islam-online.

Did you have any knowledge about Islam before your encounter with the Taliban?

- Nothing more factual than would fill the back of a postage stamp. Of course I'd subscribed to all the myths about women being subjugated and how it was an evil and violent religion full of fanatics.

Which would explain why the Sunday Express sent her to Afghanistan to cover a war against an Islamic fundamentalist regime. Funny. She looks a bit older than 14 years.
What are your views on women's rights in Islam as compared to secular Western society?

- The first thing I scrutinized when I read the Qur'an was property and divorce laws. I was amazed. I thought it could have been written by a Hollywood divorce lawyer! In fact, that's probably from where they got their inspiration. I was also pleased to see that women are equal with regards to education and spirituality, but the Qur'an does acknowledge we have the extra burdens of childbirth, breast-feeding and periods. I like to think we are the deluxe model of the human form since we have so many additional functions!

Tee-hee. I wish Ridley well. I really do. But someone with such a flimsy self-image has no business practicing journalism.

:: COINTELPRO Tool 12:45 PM [+] ::

Robert Fisk, Take Note

On its face, this Reuters report looks like just another story confirming what we already knew about the Islamo-fascist movement that is either coddled or promoted by our so-called allies:
CAIRO (Reuters) - The right-hand man of suspected September 11 mastermind Osama bin Laden has been invited to take part in a Cairo conference this weekend on the future of Islamic movements -- by telephone or the Internet.

But once you get past the brazenness of the invitation of this mass murderer to a seminar, you'll be interested in the reason why they want his input ...
"We told him (Zawahri) he should speak. He should write his reasons, his view on September 11 and the way out of the crisis the Islamist movement is now in," said Zayat, who condemns violence and says militants should make peace with the state.

"Do we stay with the same methods, do we only shout and curse the United States? Is that the only thing that will realize our objectives?" Zayat said, adding he had little doubt al Qaeda was behind the September 11 attacks.

"We don't want just to criticize. We want an objective evaluation of the way out. I hope there will be a response (from Zawahri)," he said.

Crisis, eh? Jeepers, I thought our conquest of Afghanistan, as well as our failure to pressure the Israelis into entering a good-faith agreement with people who murder them, and not to mention all of our sabre-rattling directed toward Iraq, would only make these movements stronger? What's with all the self-doubt?

:: COINTELPRO Tool 11:54 AM [+] ::

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